Wow

I haven't posted since saturday. I am a terrible daily blogger, lol. Oh what has life been like for me... that's hard to say. I've been busy. I've been working. TODAY I CLEANED MY ROOM! It's a total "OMG" moment, I know. And today I am baking. I'm afraid that I've bitten off a little more than I can chew, but I bet I can get it done. I've got 4 recipes to do: Chocolate Blossom cookies, Mocha Crinkle cookies, Marshmallow Sandwich cookies, and Two-Tone Fudge (oh my I almost came very close to typing a bad word instead of fudge....that could have been bad). However, I have caught up on some of the different songs I've been meaning to retrieve from that wide world of the internet *angellic face*. It's just sharing, I swear officer. And as we all know, sharing=caring. Ok going off that slightly ridiculous topic, I still have to wrap my presents! I don't know how I'm going to get all this done, unless I wrap as cookies bake....hmm. Now that's a possibility.

My christmas is just so weird this year. It's always been the Martin side of the family comes over Christmas Eve, they leave in time for us to go to midnight mass, then we come home and go to bed, wake up for brunch, and the Murphy family comes over for Christmas Day. This year? Not happening. Both my parents work Chrismas Eve. The Murphy's? Uncle Shawn and his family are down in AZ, Uncle Pat and his family are in ID, Uncle Jeff and his family are sticking around Sedro Wooley. They've kinda all dispensed ever since both grandparents died. It's like, there's nothing left to keep them together. It's sad....I miss my family.

BUUUUUUUUUUUUT, things could be worse.

My coffee thing had to be cancelled on sunday cuz the huge amount of snow coming down. It was moved until saturday. Saturday it was cancelled because a corporate guy called me yesterday and asked me to work 6:30-5? on friday, and 6:30-4:30 on saturday. Ugh. Looooong days. But get this! He wants to come over and help me bake today because his family plans kind of fell through for tonight, and he wants to actually spend some time around me. Argh! The only person I've ever baked with in a home setting is my mom. In school, Sarah (angel food cake in Food Management). I haven't baked for a while....I don't want to screw up and make myself look like a dumbass. I don't mind looking like a dork if I'm trying to, but otherwise....I HATE looking stupid. With a passion. Sounding stupid is just as bad, but images stick better in peoples heads than words.

I've gotten slightly addicted to this song now ever since there was a bit of it on The Love Guru... yea I'm just that cool, lol.

And now I'm hearing this song Pops had me track down Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood by Santa Esmeralda. OMG it's so good! Had to get more of them. Looooove latin music...and Native music....and African music....oh jeez. I'm such a nerd.

Speaking of nerds... I always have people tell me that I'm weird. And yes, I know that I am. But no one can ever tell me what is the weirdest thing about me. I finally got an answer from someone. He said that I am the girliest geek that he knows. When I repeated this to another one of our friends, he agreed. Woot...?

And now he wants me to get Highway To The Dangerzone. It's kinda funny. He has absolutely no idea what to do with computers, but he wants me to DL music for him. Will he even know how to play it? Aw crap... he just put me on another music-grabbing spree. He reminded me of some of the other music I've been wanting to get but forgot.... I'm gonna get going so I'm not completely overloading my brain, especially with no coffee in my system

Snow snow snow

The snow is falling harder than I've ever seen it fall. You would think that it's rain at the rate it's falling, but it hits the ground completely silent. That's how you can tell it's snow; when it makes no noise as it lands.

I froze myself today.

And I went to Red Robin with Manda, and that little punk paid for the both of us b4 I even realized it *shakes imaginary fist angrily*.....

She and I have decided that we are gonna go to the mall and do a 2-Step gift exchange. Step one, find something completely random that still reminds you of the other person somehow, and give it to her. Step 2, underwear! Lol yea....underwear exchanges are awesome, unless they are used. Otherwise that's just dirty.

Wow my brain is at a total loss over what I just said, and the images running through my head as a result of that. Talk about yuck!

Anyways, I finished off my Christmas shopping today. I braved the incoming storm after work and took care of the last few gifts, yay!

But I'm gonna get going, cuz my legs hurt from sliding out all over the place, I had to get up at 5:35 am this morning for work, my wrist is throbbing, and my ear kinda hurts. Whine a little more Caitlin...you need a few more selections for all the cheese you have. Plus, I'm kinda being girly when I say this, but I'm waiting for a call.

Oh yea...my date is tomorrow. And I got asked on a date by another guy today (and I wasn't even wearing make-up). Don't feel like writing about it now; will post tomorrow.

Oh what a day

So whenever I'm feeling a little down, there are a couple things that I can do. One, I can watch a video of my friend's two year old having the worst tantrum I've ever seen or heard of because she didn't want pigtails that day... Two, I can look at some of Manda's pictures on her myspace from icanhascheezburger.com...... Three, I can fall down the stairs.

Lmao or at least, those were my solutions today. The first two worked, not quite so much the third one. Between falling in the parking lot on saturday having a snowball fight, falling in the crosswalk on sunday, falling down the stairs AND tripping over the laundry hamper today, I think that by the time Christmas rolls around I'm just going to be one big bruise. But at least, like my mom pointed out, I'll be festive. I'll be green from the fading bruises, and red from the different scabs. Lol yes we are grossly funny.

However, the name of this post is "Oh what a day" for a reason. I woke up on time *gasp* and was able to get ready and make myself a lunch long before my mom was ready to go *double gasp*. It started snowing again right as we left our driveway. I was at work a half hour early, and that's when things started to change. Everything was going wrong, to put it mildly. Long story cut very short, I was supposed to work 8-2....that got changed to 7:30-2....that got changed to 7:30-7:30....and then THAT got changed to 7:30-5:30 cuz the big U-Haul Kahuna decided that we needed to shut down all the U-Hauls from West Seattle going north early. Thank god for me! Lol. I was NOT looking forward to shutting down the store BY MYSELF when I've only worked there FOR ONE WEEK! Talk about WAY too much pressure.

However, I wasn't able to make it to my school to make my first tuition payment. Does this mean that I am hanging my head and crying cuz I got booted from all my classes? NO! Lol. It took forever but I was finally able to get ahold of the cashiers office. Now because I sign a contract each quarter for my installment payments, they could not take my debit card over the phone without having my contract physically there in person. NEVER FEAR! The woman on the other end of the phone remembered me, and mentioned about how she remembers about how I'm always so nice, and sometimes bring them cookies (lol yea I'm just that much of a nerd), so she said "Caitlin, Merry Christmas. I'm extending your deadline until the 29th. You can keep all your classes."

*does the snoopy happy-dance*

Now see, THAT'S why you suck up to the staff around the campus, not just your instructors. It can seriously help you in the end.

Anyways....you wanna know what's really on my mind?
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I have a coffee date on sunday. It's the first time I've ever been asked to coffee. I feel so grown-up *tear*. Lol. The last time I remember going for coffee, where we were actually sitting down for serious conversation, was back when I was in high school and we were having a meeting to try and figure out how to keep SADD afloat with all the club officials graduating that year. So yea...times have changed since then. I dunno. I'm excited. I'm nervous. It seems kinda intimate and I'm afraid I'm going to go all shy and make a complete mockery of myself, especially because I can talk to him just fine on the phone for a long-ass time lol. Plus, if we have a lot of fun I would want him to come up and hang some more at my house probably, but I'm supposed to be baking that day with my mom....and the last time I invited a guy to chill at my house, well, most of you know how that went......not good, to say the least. And my gparents are supposed to be over this weekend, so BOTH my parents might be home PLUS my gparents, and if I do really like this guy like I believe I do, I don't want him to get scared off by my family.... especially Pops. Cuz he's kinda intimidating. Oh well. Maybe I'm just overthinking/over-analyzing this whole situation....I tend to do that...

But anywhozer, my wrist is starting to throb like nothing else cuz of everything I had to do with it...like shove apart two several hundred pound trailers that got frozen together...and lift an even heavier trailer onto a truck hitch....and catching myself on the stairs.....and doing the gingerbread house with my mom....and now all this typing I did. Oh...I didn't mention what I actually did to my wrist? Hahaha dorky me....I sprained it when i fell on sunday.

So to wrap this up, here's some/most of the lyrics to Love Hurts, by Incubus

"Tonight we drink to youth
And holding fast the truth
Don't want to lose what I had as a boy
My heart still has a beat
But love is now a feat
As common as a cold day in L.A.

Sometimes when I'm alone I wonder
Is there a spell that I am under
Keeping me from seeing the real thing?

Love hurts
But sometimes it's a good hurt
And it feels like I'm alive
Love sings
When it transcends the bad things
Have a heart and try me
'cause without love I won't survive

I'm fettered and abused
Stand naked and accused
Should I surface, this one-man submarine?
I only want the truth!
So tonight we drink to youth!
I'll never lose what I had as a boy

Sometimes when I'm alone I wonder
Is there a spell that I am under
Keeping me from seeing the real thing?

Love hurts
But sometimes it's a good hurt
And it feels like I'm alive
Love sings
When it transcends the bad things
Have a heart and try me 'cause without love I won't survive"

Just a small group of works

So these are the things going through my mind right now. No not the emotions behind the words....These are the actual words that are stuck in my head right now. The thing from Eminem is kinda just looping in my brain. The other stuff is just snippets of the original writing, so I've posted the whole thing in the hopes that it will quench my brain and make it go away. I know, I'm weird. But oh well.

Have you ever loved someone so much, you'd give an arm for?

Not the expression, no, literally give an arm for?

When they know they're your heart

And you know you were their armour

And you will destroy anyone who would try to harm 'her

But what happens when karma, turns right around and bites you?

And everything you stand for, turns on you, despite you?

What happens when you become the main source of her pain?

- Eminem, When I'm Gone

Ah, broken is the golden bowl! the spirit flown forever!

Let the bell toll!- a saintly soul floats on the Stygian river;

And, Guy de Vere, hast thou no tear?- weep now or nevermore!

See! on yon drear and rigid bier low lies thy love, Lenore!

Come! let the burial rite be read- the funeral song be sung!-

An anthem for the queenliest dead that ever died so young-

A dirge for her the doubly dead in that she died so young.

"Wretches! ye loved her for her wealth and hated her for her pride,

And when she fell in feeble health, ye blessed her- that she died!

How shall the ritual, then, be read?- the requiem how be sung

By you- by yours, the evil eye,- by yours, the slanderous tongue

That did to death the innocence that died, and died so young?"

Peccavimus; but rave not thus! and let a Sabbath song

Go up to God so solemnly the dead may feel no wrong.

The sweet Lenore hath "gone before," with Hope, that flew beside,

Leaving thee wild for the dear child that should have been thy bride.

For her, the fair and debonair, that now so lowly lies,

The life upon her yellow hair but not within her eyes

The life still there, upon her hair- the death upon her eyes.

"Avaunt! avaunt! from fiends below, the indignant ghost is riven-

From Hell unto a high estate far up within the Heaven-

From grief and groan, to a golden throne, beside the King of Heaven!

Let no bell toll, then,- lest her soul, amid its hallowed mirth, S

hould catch the note as it doth float up from the damned Earth!

And I!- to-night my heart is light!- no dirge will I upraise,

But waft the angel on her flight with a Paean of old days!"

-Edgar Allen Poe, Lenore

Music to hear, why hear'st thou music sadly?

Sweets with sweets war not, joy delights in joy:

Why lov'st thou that which thou receiv'st not gladly,

Or else receiv'st with pleasure thine annoy?

If the true concord of well-tuned sounds,

By unions married, do offend thine ear,

They do but sweetly chide thee, who confounds

In singleness the parts that thou shouldst bear.

Mark how one string, sweet husband to another,

Strikes each in each by mutual ordering;

Resembling sire and child and happy mother,

Who, all in one, one pleasing note do sing:

Whose speechless song being many, seeming one,

Sings this to thee: 'Thou single wilt prove none.'

- Shakespeare, Sonnet 8

I've been desperately feeling the need to clean and reorganize lately. I already reorganized all my movies, video games, and tv seasons, and I redid my parents movies, their tv seasons, and their exercise videos. Now I cant help but look at the bookshelf up here in the office, and my fingers are just itching to redo it. I haven't felt this OCD for a while...Wanna fix the books up here, wanna fix my closet, want to cycle out some of the books on my shelf and display some of the others that I have, wanna vacumn up the flock around the xmas tree, wanna vacumn my bedroom. It's driving me nuts!

And because I'm being such a dork, I'm going to put what needs to be done in order so it will actually get done the way it needs to get done

Necessary:

Order my school books - Done

Vacumn around the tree - Done

Shower - Done

Take my bonds to the bank - not looking forward to it but will be done

Clean my room amd hang my clothes

Vacumn my room

Optional:

Cycle through my books

Clean the office bookshelves

Ok my brain is trying to fry itsself out so I'm going to go now while it is still slightly intact

The First Blog

So THIS is my first ever blog. I wish I could write something monumental, dazzling the world of bloggers with the newly created existence of my internet self. But alas, I am out of brilliant writing. In pushing myself through logical classes that I care about, I have stifled all creativity.

Back in high school when I was forced into my classes by the stupid educational system, I was so bored that I had time to write and sketch whatever I wanted in any notebook I had at hand. And oh man, would I write. However, as time has passed and I have found classes that I want to take, I focus solely on those and push away any writing ideas I have. I fill my mind with how to practice law, and forget how to try and write a Lord Byron-like poem. And when I'm not at school, I'm at one of my two jobs, either teaching someone how to hook up their trailer, or trying to instruct a 9 year old on why it isn't a good idea to shoot your little brother point blank in the face with your airsoft pistol. I no longer carry a notebook or journal with me wherever I go, and no longer pay attention to my own thoughts. Pity. I don't think I used to be half-bad.

On the bright side though, at least I can focus on my homework and actually ace the papers I write for my classes.

Oh man....I just realized that this is turning into a rather self-centered blog... Crap. What's funny too, is the fact that I don't normally try and focus on myself unless I'm trying to fix my flaws. Maybe I'm taking my heading too seriously. Maybe I should quit stalling and go get dressed and makeup-tized for work. Yea...that's a plan.

So long everyone. I will try to make my next post more realistic.